


Pain and happiness

by Kalexforever91 (orphan_account)



Series: True Love (Kalex) [3]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alcoholic Kara, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, Dark Kara Danvers, Eventual Happy Ending, F/F, Fist Fights, Heartbreak, Kalex, Out of Character Kara, Romantic Alex Danvers/Kara Danvers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2017-11-18
Packaged: 2019-01-30 17:49:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 12,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12658443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Kalexforever91
Summary: (Multi-Verse: 118) Alex left Kara 5 years ago for Maggie Sawyer, 5 years later Kara Grant has an Alcohol problem and got into fights and she lost all her friends and her mother has given up on her, will Kara find the strength to heal?How will Alex's return go... especially with her engagement to Maggie Sawyer?Help or hindrance?





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Here is the newest of my Kalex story, I could not wait to post this... I am very excited about it and hopes it will be the best.

Kara sat in her office, she was finishing up the paperwork of today’s business dealings with Queen Industries and Wayne Enterprises before getting to her feet, she hated Mondays with a passion, not just because of the work but also because of what Mondays represent and in this case, it was worse.

On this day 5 years ago, when she was 20 years old… her first and only love Alex Danver’s broke her heart and went off with Maggie Sawyer, since then Kara had gotten drunk, jumped into bed with various other women and even got into fights.

The memory of Alex flowed through her mind and Kara became saddened as she remembered Alex, she then grew darker and downed her whiskey before heading out the door for the night.

She used to be so different back then, she was all sunshine and roses but then Alex broke her heart and that was it, she turned into her grandmother… she became cold and distant, only her best friends could get through the walls.

Her cell phone rang out, she looked at the name and smiled “Hey Lena, what’s up?” she asked.

“Hey Kara, you free to go for drinks tonight?” Lena asked.

Kara sighed heavily, she was in need to get herself blind drunk and take another woman home to her apartment, get her into bed and fuck till she felt numb.

“Yeah ok, I’m just leaving the office now” Kara said as she left her office and got into her car.

The club:

Kara arrived, Lena smiled at her best friend “Drinks on me, what do you want?” Lena asked her best friend.

Kara placed her bag down as she sat down “Shots” she replied simply.

Lena sighed heavily and shook her head “Not tonight, please Kara” Lena pleaded.

“It’s Monday and you know what that means” Kara stated firmly.

Lena sighed and nodded her head before getting up and she walked over to the bar and ordered their shots, she had hoped that the Kara they knew and loved would come back but Kara had all but exhausted all her old friends: Lucy did not bother these days and neither did James, Winn and Kara fell out and Cat simply gave up trying to convince Kara.

Sooner or later Kara would push Lena away like she did everyone else.

Lena and Kara did some shots and Kara got blind drunk, she got flirtier with almost every woman she saw, Lena was getting fed up of her best friend and her patience was wearing thin, Kara did not care though because she was happier like this.

Kara was dancing and grinding against a gorgeous redhead when Lena finally snapped, she dragged Kara off the redhead who complained in response “You listen to me Kara, this is going too far” Lena snarled, “You got a problem” she said.

“So what, you’re not my mother” Kara replied, her words slurring in response.

“No, your mother has all but given up on you and you pushed all your friends aside, every friend that has tried to help you and you pushed them away” Lena said, Kara lowered her head in response.

“Then why you still here, why don’t you leave me… everyone else has” Kara whimpered, her mind flashing back to the years of happiness she had with Alex, their years in high school together, their college years together and finally to the day they moved in together before Alex declared her feelings for Maggie and walked out of Kara’s life in tears.

Lena shook her head “Because I believe my best friend is still in there, the one who Alex fell in love with” Lena said, Kara looked up at Lena with fury “Don’t speak her name!” she shrieked before she punched Lena hard in the jaw sending Lena to the floor, Kara stumbled before she fell, her knuckle painfully throbbing after punching Lena.

Lena got to her feet and she took a card out of her pocket and then some money as Kara sat on the stool at the bar, swaying back and forth as she clutched her head.

Lena nodded her head before slapping the money on the counter and then the card “You got these 2 choices Kara, get help and see a therapist, or drink yourself to death because I am through… let me know when my best friend decides to show herself and tell her that her mother misses her and wants her to come home” with that Lena left Kara there.

Kara picked up the card and then the money, looking back between the 2 before looking at herself in the reflection “I’m a mess” she whispered to herself before looking to the bartender who looked ready to pour another shot out and she shook her head “No… I’m done” she whispered.

The bartender smiled and placed the bottle on the shelf before picking up the phone “I’ll call a taxi” she said.

Kara shook her head “No, I’ll walk home… besides I need to throw up” she said and she darted out the back and allowed herself to throw up, coughing and gagging.

Footsteps were coming up behind her, she silently hoped it was not a mugger or a rapist because then that would make the situation worse than ever, slowly somebody gently took her long blonde hair into their hands and held it back as she gagged and vomited some more.

“Oh Kara, I’ve really messed up… I’m sorry” a voice whispered.

Kara froze in shock and her eyes went wide as she instantly recognised the voice, slowly she turned her head to face the owner of the voice, her throat dried up and she squeaked as she saw the woman she had not seen in 5 years… the woman responsible for her pain and her misery.

“Alex” she whispered.

Alex smiled sadly “Yeah Kara… it’s me” she whispered back.

Kara’s world became darker and began to spin out of control before finally she collapsed unconscious into Alex’s arms.

Alex looked at Kara “Forgive me” she whispered tearfully as she carried Kara away towards her car, Maggie was not going to like this.

Neither was Kara when she woke up, the question was: Would Kara shout and scream? Or would she punch Alex?

Time would tell.


	2. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next day, Kara wakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the latest chapter as promised, decided not to go with Kara hitting Alex because it did not seem right to me but do not worry, you will see Kara get mad and throw punches in future chapters.
> 
> I hope you enjoy.

Alex sat in her apartment the next morning, Kara was asleep in the spare bedroom from the amount she drank the night before and Maggie had gone off to work early though she was not happy that Alex brought Kara home to the apartment.

Alex did not care though, she hated herself for the pain she put her beloved Kara through, she had been secretly keeping tabs on her for 5 years, it broke her heart when she discovered just what Kara had become after Alex broke her heart.

They made a promise to always be together, forever but Alex broke that promise, now here they were with Kara passed out in the spare bedroom, it had been an accident for Alex finding Kara last night, she was on her way back home from work when she saw Kara stumbling out of the club and began throwing up.

Alex felt the guilt bubbling up inside her as she watched before heading over, now here she was sitting on the couch waiting for Kara to wake up, Alex left some aspirin and some water on the side table next to the spare bed.

There was some shuffling about coming from the spare bedroom and Alex took a deep breath, Kara had woken up.

The door opened wide and Kara groaned painfully as she stepped out of the spare bedroom, of course last night was one big blur for her, she had no idea where she was but the only thing she did remember was that she was dancing with a gorgeous blonde and that was it, also her fist hurt as if she punched somebody but she could not remember who.

“Fucking hangover, I’m going to have to stop” she muttered to herself.

“Stop drinking?” Alex asked as she looked at Kara, even in the state she was in Kara was still as beautiful as ever.

“Fuck that, I’ve got to stop waking up” Kara replied before freezing up, she recognised the voice instantly and she remembered last night in the alleyway, she turned around and spotted Alex sitting on the couch with a soft smile “Hey Kara” Alex greeted.

Kara narrowed her eyes before shaking off her confusion, soon her face became one of rage and hatred and she grabbed her jacket and bag and headed for the door only to be stopped by Alex who dived in her path “Hold up Kara, you are not going anywhere in the state you are in” Alex said firmly.

“Get out of my way Alex, I mean it!” Kara growled, Alex shook her head in defiance.

Kara grabbed her by the hair and pulled her out the way of the door making Alex yelp, Kara brought her fist up ready to punch her but Alex did not react “Do it… if it makes you feel better then hit me” Alex whispered.

Kara simply just let her go and she grabbed the door handle before Alex called to her “Kara wait” Alex called, Kara looked back at her.

“I’m sorry… I never meant to hurt you… I never meant for this to happen” Alex whispered.

“Tell me something Alex… were you fucking Maggie whilst we were together?” Kara asked.

Alex narrowed her eyes and looked at Kara in shock “No, Kara I would never do that to you” Alex replied.

“Excuse me for not taking your word for it, tell your girlfriend to stay away from me or I’ll show her just how angry I can get” and with that Kara slammed the door shut behind her, Alex allowed the tears to pour down her cheek.

She could not blame Kara for thinking what she did, if the situation was reversed then it would be what Alex would be asking the same question, but the situation was not reversed, Alex was the reason for Kara’s pain.

She broke Kara’s heart and broke the promise they both made to each other.

She and Maggie became close sure but Alex never once cheated on Kara, she loved her with all her heart but Maggie… she was excitement, at that time Alex was going through a stage where she would be out partying at all hours and not come home till late.

Kara was safety and security but also commitment and that was something Alex always wanted but then she hit her party girl stage, she met Maggie and things went on from there now here she was, and the party girl was gone and now she was engaged to Maggie.

The spark she had with Maggie was gone but the spark she had with Kara never faded, it only got more intense and now seeing Kara standing there made her realise just how much she screwed up and now it was too late, she was married to Maggie and doomed to be unhappy.

As Kara slipped further into the darkness and beyond her reach.

Mean whilst:

Kara returned home to her apartment after a long walk, she remembered everything the night before and the guilt was weighing her down, punching Lena in the jaw had been a wake up of just how low she sunk but right now she needed to drink this pain away after seeing Alex.

Grabbing the bottles of whiskey from the cabinet she went back onto the table and she began to drink until night had set in, she did not care anymore about anything… she pushed all her friends away and now she was alone.

How wrong she was.

The sound of somebody knocking on the door drew her attention, she did not find the strength to get up “Come in” she called, the door opened wide and her mother stepped in.

“Mommy!” Kara squealed, Cat shook her head and pried the whiskey out of her daughter’s hands, Kara pouted and shook her head “No… mine” she said.

“Let it go!” Cat ordered and Kara relented, she was not drunk completely, she was halfway between drunk and sober but hoping to fall deeper into that dark pit.

“Look at you Kara, this is getting ridiculous” Cat said firmly.

Kara lowered her head and she nodded her head, Cat’s eyes went wide with shock as Kara looked to her “I need help Mom” Kara whispered shaky before breaking down into tears.

Cat smiled as she wrapped her daughter up in her arms and held her close before pulling back “Ok then let’s get some coffee in you and get you washed and changed… your outfit stinks of vomit and booze” Cat said.

She headed to the kitchen with the bottles of whiskey, she looked to Kara who nodded in response and she watched as Cat poured the remaining whiskey down the sink before looking to Kara.

“I’ll make arrangements for you to start AA as soon as possible” she said before making the coffee.

Cat never gave up on her daughter, because Kara never gave up on her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading.


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara visits Lena for forgiveness and Alex thinks about her biggest mistake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the latest chapter of the story, I hope you will enjoy it :)

Kara and her mother sat in stone silence, Kara had got washed and changed and was smelling a lot fresher than before when she smelt of vomit and booze, her knuckle was still bruised from punching Lena and that guilt weighed heavily on her shoulders, she was spiralling out of control and she needed to get better.

Her mother signed her up for an AA meeting that she too attended, the same one that Kara signed her up for when she spiralled out of control after the death of her wife Astra, she fell into a depression and spiralled into the bottle.

She realized that Kara got that from her, this needed to stop before Kara drove herself into a grave and Cat did not want to lose her daughter, she took her daughters hand into her own and inspected the bruised knuckle carefully “So who’s jaw did your fist encounter?” Cat asked.

Kara had Cat’s alcohol problem, but she also had Astra’s temper, a dangerous combination.

“Lena’s” Kara whispered, her voice laced with guilt.

Cat sighed heavily “You know what you need to do… right?” Cat asked.

Kara nodded her head in response “Yes mom” she replied and she got to her feet, I’ll go and see her first before I go to AA” Kara put her jacket on.

“Do you need me to come with you” Cat asked.

Kara smiled and shook her head “No mom, I’ll see you at AA… I need to do this alone” Kara said and Cat nodded her head.

Lena was sitting in her apartment admiring the bruise on her jaw that Kara gave her last night, Kara had one hell of a punch on her and if she punches Lena any harder she would have knocked her out.

She did feel guilty for leaving Kara there at the club alone with a choice to get help or continue to drink herself to death, she wanted to go back and drag her friend home, she needed to be firm.

The sound of the door opening drew her attention and Lena looked up at her and smiled seeing her looking a bit more better than before.

“Hey” Kara greeted with a mere whisper as she fidgeted with her hands nervously.

“You are looking better than yesterday” Lena replied.

Kara nodded her head “You were right… I need help, I’m off to an AA meeting with my mother” Kara replied.

Lena nodded her head in return “Ok good” she replied, Kara looked at the bruise on Lena’s and she lowered her head before looking back at Lena, her eyes watering more than ever “I’m so sorry… I didn’t mean to hit you” Kara whispered.

Lena nodded her head and sighed “Its ok, it’s my fault… I brought Alex’s name up and you reacted” Lena stood up and walked closer to Kara.

Kara shook her head “Still no excuse… you have been my best friend and you stood by me when I pushed everyone away… I will do anything to make it up to you” Kara said.

Lena smiled “You can start by giving me a hug” she whispered.

Kara gave a choked laugh and she wrapped her arms around Lena tight. Lena smiled and she hugged Kara tightly and they remained that way for a while “You want me to come with you to AA?” Lena asked and Kara nodded her head.

“Yes” she whispered, Lena grabbed her coat “And after your meeting, you can treat me to dinner” she said firmly.

Kara laughed as she nodded her head, the awkwardness hanging in the air had lifted though the guilt remained inside her, she knew it would be a long journey but she was prepared to make it but she needed to apologies to Lucy and Winn when she had the time, she screwed up and it was time to right those wrongs.

Especially now that Alex was back in town with Maggie, but the question was, why was they back?

Maggie returned home to the apartment and she sighed heavily as she kicked her shoes off, Alex was sitting on the kitchen with her wine in her hands, Maggie looked at her concerned “Hey, are you ok?” she asked.

“Kara’s gone, she left this morning after you left” Alex said.

“Come on Alex, did you really think she would just forgive you like nothing happened?” Maggie asked.

“But Kara was my best friend before we began dating… I wanted to have her back in my life” Alex said as she got to her feet “Call me selfish if you want but I miss her” she whispered.

“Alex, Kara will never forgive us… we broke her heart and the mess you dragged in last night is only the tip of the iceberg” Maggie said firmly “Let her go” she said.

Alex turned to her “I CAN’T… she’s... She is my Kara” Alex whispered.

Maggie sighed, she shook her head “I’m not dealing with this tonight, I’m going to bed” she growled as she headed off to the bedroom leaving Alex in the kitchen.

Alex pulled out the photo album from the draw and she opened it up, inside was every happy memory between her and Kara and she turned over to the 5th page, it was the night she and Kara laid under the stars and made love for the first time, it was the night they declared their love for each other and Alex smiled as she remembered that night.

She could taste Kara on her tongue and could feel Kara in her heart, she chose Maggie for the excitement but there was no spark, and there was no spark between them now because Kara was firmly locked in her heart.

She turned to the next page and her eyes watered more, inside was an engagement ring stuck to the page underneath a picture of them together and below was the words ‘My Beloved… Marry Me?’ it read.

Alex put the book on the table and she curled herself up into a ball and began to sob her heart out, she would have said yes without hesitating.

She royally screwed up and in doing so she destroyed the best thing that had happened to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :)


	4. Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An old friend returns and jealousy rises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the latest chapter, I hope you will enjoy it.

The next night the restaurant was not busy, Kara and Lena took up their table that Kara had booked after the AA meeting she attended, it was nice having her mother and Lena there by her side giving her emotional support.

Talking about her problems made her feel lighter but the guilt remained as she thought about how she punched her best friend in the jaw, Lena saw the emotional turmoil that Kara was going through and she smiled whilst placing a hand on Kara’s shoulder comfortingly.

Of course, it was going to be a long road till she fully recovers and there will be times when she will relapse, she silently hoped that this situation with Alex quietens down and it would allow her time to recover.

She needed off the booze and what she needed was time, probably a vacation seeing as to how she did nothing but work and drink.

“So, want to talk about it?” Lena asked.

“Talk about what?” Kara asked in return.

“Whatever it is that’s on your mind” Lena said.

“Oh, well I’m thinking I need a vacation… but now I am thinking about everyone I pushed away” Kara replied broken.

Lena nodded her head before smiling “Lucy and Winn miss you Kara” Lena said.

“I miss them… a lot” she whispered, she closed her eyes “I just don’t know how to do it” she sighed.

“Just apologies Kara, Lucy told me herself that she will wait as long as it takes for you to come and apologies to her for your behaviour” Lena said.

Kara’s heart melted as she smiled “Guess tomorrow I am heading off to Lucy’s place” She said.

They sat and ate their meal and drank their soda’s, Kara did not trust herself with Wine and harder booze, she needed to be clear headed, so they ate their meal and talked about the days ahead.

Lena had planned a whole recovery thing, Kara needed to focus her aggression on something other than booze and bar brawls, so she decided to take Kara to the gym.

Kara was not keen on the idea of but then again with Lena she had no choice, Kara decided to visit the bar much to Lena’s disappointment but then Kara surprised her, she ordered soda and Lena had the same.

“You know for a few minutes I thought you were going to fall off the wagon after 1 day” Lena said with a smirk.

“Well I love it here and plus I need to apologies to the bartender/owner for my behaviour the other night” Kara said smiling at her and her eyes scanned the bar.

“You are looking for somebody in particular?” Lena asked.

“The redhead I was dancing with, I need to apologies to her too… I feel like I led her on” Kara said.

“I dragged you away and besides you got nothing to apologies for” Lena said but Kara was not listening as she scanned the crowd for the redhead only to find somebody she was not ready to face for a long time, Alex and her fiancée Maggie Sawyer playing pool.

The words fiancée had Kara’s jaw set and a foul taste set in her mouth, it should have been her and Alex engaged but then Maggie fucking Sawyer turned up.

“Oh shit” Kara whispered to herself and Lena looked, her eyes widened in shock before turning into pure hate “That bitch… I’ll fucking kill her” Lena hissed, she went to get up only for Kara to grab her hand to stop her.

“Don’t Lena… she is not worth it” Kara said.

Lena growled and the sound of somebody coughing drew their attention, Kara looked up and saw the gorgeous Diana Prince who was the CEO of Prince Enterprises and one of Kara oldest friends, they drifted apart though when Diana left the city.

“Diana” Kara whispered in a state of shock.

Diana smiled at her “It’s good to see you Kara” she whispered, Kara got to her feet and she pulled Diana into a tight hug, Diana giggled and squeezed Kara tight to her.

“It’s been so long, how have you been?” Diana asked, “How are things with Alex?” she asked.

Kara smiled sadly “We broke up, she met somebody better” she whispered.

Diana looked shocked then her face darkened in rage, nobody was better than Kara, she was perfect in every way apart from the anger issue that she picked up off Astra, if Alex did not think Kara was good enough then it was her loss.

“I kind of fell into the bottle since then” Kara admitted ashamed of herself and Diana smiled gently and nodded her head, she knew how much Kara loved Alex and she knew that losing her would drive her into a spiral.

Lena spoke up then “She is here now with her ‘fiancée’” Lena said as she pointed to the pool table where Alex and Maggie were playing pool, Diana smirked when an idea came to her mind.

Back when Alex and Kara were together, Alex was insanely jealous of how much time Kara would spend with Diana, which was not weird for them because they were best friends.

She pulled out a piece of paper and scribbled something down before looking to Kara “Want to drive her nuts?” she asked.

Kara looked curious “What do you have in mind?” she asked in return.

“I’m going to lean down and pretend to whisper into your ear, when I do… I want you to giggle just enough to draw her attention before you hand me this piece of paper” Diana instructed.

Kara smirked whilst Lena shook her head “Oh this is so not going to end well” she whispered.

Diana leaned down and mouthed silently to give the appearance that she was whispering into Kara’s ears, Kara giggled shyly just enough and right on cue Alex’s head snapped up and looked in Kara’s direction.

As soon as her eyes landed on Diana whispering into Kara’s ears, she grew furious… Lena took a discreet look and saw just how Alex was reacting and sure enough Alex was growing more jealous by the second.

Lena looked back to her drink and smirked as she looked to Kara and Diana who took up a spot next to Kara “Want to know how else you could drive her mad?” she asked.

Diana and Kara perked up and Lena winked suggestively “Dance”

Diana smirked understanding instantly, Kara was more oblivious to it though and needed more of a direct approach, Lena leaned across and whispered “Take Diana onto the dancefloor and put on a show for Alex, make her really blow her cool” Lena said.

Kara was grinning like a kid in a candy store as she took Diana’s hands “I hope you can keep up” she said making Diana laugh.

Lena watched… Oh this was going to be quite the show.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How did you like that chapter, I hope you liked how I brought Diana into this?
> 
> Thanks for reading :)


	5. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara and Diana dances causes Alex to storm out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the latest chapter as promised, I hope you enjoy.

Kara led Diana onto the dancefloor and Alex could only watch from the pool table, the game and Maggie forgotten as she watched as Kara and Diana began to move with the music, their bodies grinding together as their hands run over each other’s bodies and through each other’s hair.

Her grip on her pool cue tightened up and she was becoming angrier as she watched from the side-lines, Lena smirked in satisfaction as she watched Alex becoming jealous of Kara’s and Diana moving together.

Their bodies pressed together as they ground against one another as their hips swayed to the music, Alex felt her cool snap and she stormed out the bar with Maggie following close behind her.

Kara and Diana pulled apart and Diana was giggling along with Kara “Did you see her face, the vein on her neck was pulsing so hard I’d thought it would explode” Kara said laughing.

Diana nodded her head as she laughed with Kara “It’s good to see you smiling and laughing again Kara” she said.

Kara smiled, she hugged Diana tight “I’m glad you are back Diana, how long are you back for?” she asked.

Diana shrugged “I got some business with your mother, then I am meeting up with some people in hopes of bringing one of my companies to the city” she replied.

“I hope we can catch up, it has been a long time” Kara said, Diana nodded her head.

“I would love that” Diana replied, “You got anything planned tomorrow, I’d love to take you to dinner” she said.

“I got my AA meeting but I am free after the meeting” Kara answered, Diana smiled “Ok” she replied before writing down her number, handing it to Kara she smiled “Here is my number, text me when you are finished at your meeting and I’ll come and pick you up… we have so much to catch up” Diana said.

Kara hugged her friend tight “I have missed you Diana, I will be looking forward to catching up with you tomorrow” she said.

Diana hugged her back and planted a kiss on Kara’s cheek before heading out, Kara sighed heavily and sat back down and looked to Lena “How was that?” she asked.

Lena was smirking “Are you kidding, seeing you both grinding against each other like that was hot as fuck, I swear I damn well nearly had to go to the bathroom and stick my fingers in my pus…” Kara slapped her upside the back of the head to silence her causing Lena to Laugh but Kara was smirking teasingly “Did you see how Alex reacted?” she asked.

“For a moment I thought she was going to throw Diana off and take you on the pool table, she was furious” Lena said causing Kara to giggle in response.

Mean whilst:

Alex stormed back into the apartment she shared with Maggie, Maggie was not far behind her of course and she was furious with Alex for storming out the way she did “What the hell was that Alex?!” Maggie asked angrily.

Alex grabbed a beer bottle from the fridge “Nothing!” she spat between her teeth as the memory of Kara dancing with Diana filtered through her brain driving her mad.

“Don’t lie to me Alex, you went mad when you saw Kara dancing with Diana” Maggie stated.

“Just leave it alone Maggie!” Alex shouted, her fists clenching tight as she tried to clear the memory of Kara and Diana together.

Maggie was not backing down though, she knew the answer “Tell me the truth Alex!” Maggie demanded.

Alex turned to face her with her eyes blazing with fury “FINE… YOU WANT ME TO SAY IT, I’M STILL IN LOVE WITH KARA!!!” Alex shouted in rage “SEEING HER DANCING WITH DIANA MAKES ME SO ANGRY!” she could not stop the memory of Kara and Diana dancing, she could not stop the memory of the moment she broke Kara’s heart and Kara running away in tears.

Seeing Kara hating her so much made her want to throw up but now seeing her with Diana… that memory flooded her and with a scream of rage Alex punched the mirror hard causing it to shatter.

Alex stood there panting, pain searing in her fist as blood dripped from the wound on her fist after she had punched the mirror, Maggie fell silent and she shook her head “How long… how long have you been in love with her?” she whispered.

“I never stopped loving her” Alex replied.

Maggie ran a hand over her face and into her own hair before glaring at Alex who had her back to her “Was this ever real… me and you?” Maggie asked.

Alex shook her head “No, it wasn’t” she whispered in response.

Maggie turned and walked away towards the door “Goodbye Alex” she said firmly before heading out the door.

Alex looked at her hand and she dropped onto the floor and sobbed, she dialled her mother’s number and soon Eliza answered, “Hey Alex, is everything ok?” she asked.

“Mom” Alex whimpered, “I’ve screwed up” she whispered.

“Let me guess… Kara?” Eliza asked, Alex nodded her head.

“Yes” she whispered.

“I’m on my way” Eliza said and soon she hung up the phone as Alex wrapped her hand in a bandage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading :)


	6. Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Diana talks to Kara, mean whilst Eliza talks to Alex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the latest chapter, I hope you all enjoy this chapter.

Kara finished her newest AA meeting and she and Diana met up outside the place where the meeting took place, Diana opened the door for Kara to enter the car, Kara sat in the passenger seat and smiled as she buckled up as Diana did the same.

“How was your day?” Diana asked, Kara nodded her head.

“Emotional” Kara replied, Diana looked confused and Kara explained just how low she sank and how she pushed all her friends away including Lucy and Winn, today she went to go and see Lucy and apologised for her behaviour.

At first, she thought Lucy would not accept her apology but then Lucy wrapped her arms tight around her and they sank into a tender hug as Kara sobbed into her best friend’s shoulder.

Diana and Kara talked about each other’s days and Diana looked pensive as if she was going to bring up a sore subject “Kara, I know you probably don’t want to talk about this, but shouldn’t you talk to Alex?” she asked.

Kara looked to as if she lost her marbles “Uh why?” she asked back, “She made her choice” she said adding a growl to her words.

“I’m not saying that you should forgive her Kara but… you and Alex were best friends before you dated, I know that she hurt you, the Kara I remember though would never just walk away no matter how much she was hurt” Diana said.

“That Kara is gone Diana” Kara whispered.

Diana smiled, she shook her head “No… she isn’t, I can still see her… in your eyes” Diana whispered, “You miss her, you miss Alex” she said, Kara closed her eyes, Diana took her hand into her own “I’m not saying forgive her, just talk to her” she whispered.

Kara sighed heavily, she closed her eyes before nodding her head “I’ll think about it, now can we go back to eating and talking about other things” Kara said Diana nodded her head in agreement though her thoughts were still lamenting on wherever or not Kara would talk to Alex.

Diana was right, she did need to talk to Alex but right now all she wanted to do was talk to her best friend.

Mean whilst Alex was in her apartment with her mother, she had just finished explaining the events that led to this moment here and now and Eliza was not best please about it all, but she would judge her daughter, she was merely disappointed in her.

Though she did have questions.

“So how did you know Kara was going to propose?” Eliza asked confused.

“I found the engagement ring in the photo album, she stuck it in there and put it in the draw knowing that the next time we opened it up I would find it, then I broke her heart and she must have forgot it… or worse” Alex whispered.

“Worse?” Eliza asked softly, Alex nodded her head “Worse is leaving it here on purpose as a reminder of how much I hurt her” she said.

“So, what you going to do?” Eliza asked.

“Right now? Nothing… Maggie is gone thank god but Kara, I don’t think there is anything I can do to make it right with her” Alex whispered in defeat.

“Do you want to make it up to her?” Eliza asked, Alex nodded her head.

“Of course, I do mom, Kara is everything I wanted since we were best friends as kids, from the day we met I wanted to marry her, wanted a family with her” Alex said firmly.

Eliza snorted “If that’s the case then why go to Maggie?” she asked.

Alex closed her eyes and lowered her head “I fell off the rails, mom… dad had just died, I needed to vent, Kara tried getting me to talk but I pushed her away and I began to party hard and then when Maggie came along… I just wanted excitement, just to ignore the pain of losing dad” Alex replied.

Eliza glared at her daughter “Don’t, don’t you dare excuse your behaviour by using your father’s death” she snarled.

Alex lowered her head “Mom, I was broken” she whispered.

“AND YOU THINK I WAS ANY BETTER ALEXANDRA DANVERS, I LOST MY HUSBAND… HE WAS EVERYTHING TO ME!!!” Eliza screamed “I tried to call you, Kara came to me in tears because you were pulling away and then when you ran off with ‘Maggie’” she spat between her teeth, she continued “When you ran off with Maggie, Kara was so hateful and angry, I sat by her bedside every night at the hospital because she got into fights, she drove her car so fast that she smashed into a tree, she barely survived!” Eliza’s voice was hard and unforgiving now.

“Because of you Kara had a Death wish… now I can see the end of her pain because Diana is here, she will help bring Kara back but you Alex” she stopped to take a deep breath “Alex you don’t deserve her” Eliza finished.

And uncomfortable silence filled the room after Eliza’s rant, Alex knew Eliza was right… she had no right to Kara, she had her chance and she ruined it and nothing was going to change that fact no matter how hard she fought.

But that was the thing, Alex did not care if it took a lifetime anymore because she would never stop fighting for Kara.

The sound of the door knocking drew their attention and Eliza opened the door, her eyes widened in shock “Kara” she said softly, Alex’s heart leapt at the sight of Kara standing there at her doorway.

Kara smiled “Hey Eliza, can I come in?” she asked and Eliza nodded her head before stepping to the side to allow Kara to enter the apartment before closing the door behind her, Eliza turned to her and smiled “Well I see you are looking a lot better” she commented.

Kara smiled and nodded “I have been attending AA meetings” she replied before looking to Alex and then turned her attention to Eliza “Can I have a moment with Alex in private please?” she asked.

Eliza looked unsure at first causing Kara to laugh loudly “Do not worry, I won’t hit her” she reassured, Eliza nodded her head before grabbing her coat and she headed out the door leaving Alex and Kara alone.

Alex gulped heavily, she needed to win Kara back… but how?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thank you all for reading :)


	7. Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara and Alex talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter down, hope you enjoy it.

Kara and Alex stood there in silence and Kara was fidgeting with her hands, Alex was standing on the other end of the room but smiling as Kara was standing before her, she thought about their past together; every laugh they had together, every smile and every cry they shared made her heart melt.

Kara and Alex soon got fed up of the silence and they opened their mouths and spoke at once “It’s good to see you” Alex said at the same time as Kara spoke up “I think we need to talk” they stopped and realised they spoke at once and they burst into a giggle.

Alex nodded her head and motioned with her hands “Please, you first” she said.

Kara nodded before taking a deep breath “I think we need to talk” Kara said.

Alex closed her eyes before looking to Kara “Yeah, you are right” she whispered and took a deep breath.

Kara took a deep breath “You shattered my heart Alex” she whispered, Alex closed her eyes felt her eyes water, Kara was not going to hold back with her and whatever she had to say Alex knew she had it coming.

“Alex, being with you… was the happiest time of my life, we were happy” she started, “Then when Jeremiah died… you changed, you stopped talking to me and you started staying out late, started drinking and partying with your friends” Kara continued, Alex remembered how Kara would be still up waiting for her to come in, and every night Alex did not drag herself in until about 2:00am.

Alex went to speak but Kara cut her off “You cheated on me with Maggie Alex, I mean… why wasn’t I good enough?” Kara whispered as her eyes flooded with tears.

Alex shook her head “No, no Kara… I never cheated on you, no matter how far I sank I did not sleep with Maggie whilst you and I was together” Alex defended.

Kara shook her head “Alex… can you see why I am thinking that though?! Tell me this… if the situation was reversed and it was me who ran off with Lena, what would you think?” Kara asked.

Alex shook her head “No… you would never do that to me” Alex said, she knew Kara wouldn’t.

Kara nodded her head “You’re right… I wouldn’t, because I loved you to god damn much to ever hurt you, we made a promise… a promise you broke” Kara said.

Closing her eyes Alex sighed heavily and she nodded before looking to Kara, her eyes flooding with tears “Then please tell me, what can I do to make it right between us… I’ll do anything” Alex pleaded.

Kara shook her head “There is nothing you can do Alex… I can never trust you again” Kara turned and walked away, Alex’s heart cracking every time Kara stepped closer to the door.

Kara stopped in front of the door when she turned to Alex “The engagement ring, do you have it?” she asked.

Alex grabbed the book and took the ring out that was hidden inside, this was the last piece Kara had left behind that served as a reminder of what she had done, Kara took the ring gently from Alex’s hand.

Their fingers touched for a second and Kara jumps back, Alex smiled when she felt the spark between them, Kara looked to the ring before looking to Alex “You know… I always wondered what your answer would have been if I had asked, if none of this happened” Kara whispered before looking to Alex “What would you have said?” she asked.

“Yes… I would have said yes” she whispered back tearfully, Kara nodded her head “Have a good life Alex” she said before she walked out the apartment door.

Once the apartment door slammed shut, Alex’s heart shattered, she dropped to her knees and sobbed heavily, her hand on her chest where her heart was except it was not beating now… it was shattered because of the mistake she made.

Night had set in, Alex was drinking heavily and she was a mess, her eyes were red and puffy from the amount of crying she had done and she was emotionally exhausted, Kara’s visit had left a pit inside her and nothing was going to fill it.

She lost the will to fight, she lost all hope… now there was nothing left.

Her mother was right, she did not deserve Kara… she did not deserve anything, she caused the woman she was in love with pain and there was no way to fix it… without Kara, she was nothing.

Mean whilst:

Diana located Kara in the one place she feared, guilt instantly filled her when she saw the sight before her, Kara was sitting at the bar with a glass of whiskey in her hand, she was looking in deep thought, her eyes were red from crying.

“Kara” she whispered.

Kara looked to Diana and smiled softly “Hey” she replied.

“Kara, how many of those have you drunk?” Diana asked worried.

Kara shook her head and she pushed the glass gently away “I have not drunk any, I ordered that one glass but can’t bring myself to drink it” she replied.

Diana smiled and sat down next to her “What stopped you?” she asked.

Kara smiled, she looked to Diana “You, I thought about how disappointed in me you would be” she said.

Diana grinned and she pulled Kara into a tight hug “Let’s say, we get out of here and go back to my place and watch movies whilst huddled up on the couch” she suggested.

Kara nodded her head “That sounds like the perfect idea” she answered, they walked out of the club hand in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :)


	8. Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara and Diana go on a date whilst Lena waits at home but the date does no go well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the latest chapter, I hope you enjoy.

Kara and Diana were huddled on the couch later that night with their arms wrapped around each other tightly, Kara and Alex’s conversation had been tough but now Kara felt better for it though she was close to falling back into the bottle but she didn’t, Diana stopped her luckily.

Kara snuggled up to Diana and gave a soft sigh as Diana ran her fingers through Kara’s hair tenderly, Kara hummed in response as Diana run her fingers through her hair along her scalp and Kara moaned in response, loving the feeling of Diana’s fingers through her hair.

Diana smiled when she heard Kara moan in response “Kara, can I ask you something?” Diana asked.

Kara hummed in response “Sure” she replied with a smile.

“Well I was asking if you would like to go out to dinner with me tomorrow night?” Diana asked softly.

“You know we can go out to dinner anytime you like” Kara replied with a smile.

“No I mean… a date” Diana asked.

“Oh… you mean… oh I see…” Kara said and looked shocked.

Diana smiled and nodded her head before looking slightly upset “If you don’t want to I understand…” she said but Kara cut her off “Yes” she replied.

Diana looked shocked at first “You will?” she asked, Kara nodded her head, Diana smiled before she pulled Kara into a tight hug “Great, ok tomorrow I will take you to the most romantic restaurant I know” she said.

“I will look forward to it” Kara said.

They parted ways later that night after the movie ended, Diana had a spring in her step at the mere thought of finally having a date with Kara tomorrow night, Kara went to bed with a smile on her face.

The next night Kara was preparing for her date with Diana when Lena walked into the apartment with a smile “Hey Kara” she greeted.

“Hey Lena, thanks for coming” Kara greeted in return as she hugged her best friend tight “I need your help” she said.

Lena looked curious “Yeah, why the wardrobe panic?” she asked.

“I’m going on a date” Kara answered with a beaming smile.

Lena became shocked before she pulled her best friend into a tight hug “Oh I am so happy for you, so who’s the lucky lady?” she asked.

“Diana” Kara answered as she curled her hair as Lena rummaged through her closet.

“Wow, you and Diana are getting closer” Lena said with a smirk, “Careful though, who knows what might happen” she teased.

Kara rolled her eyes at her best friend “Uh we go to dinner, eat and drink… soda for me of course… come back to my place…” Kara was cut off by Lena.

“Then you have wild, passionate and lustful sex that leaves you panting and begging for more” Lena threw herself onto the bed and arched her back as she brought the back of her left hand to her forehead, sighing dramatically “Oh Diana, please… touch my body that aches for you’” she said giving her best imitation of Kara’s voice.

Kara tossed a pillow at her “I do not sound like that” she said making Lena laughed, Kara shook her head “Trust me, no sex tonight” she said.

“No sex?” Lena asked, “Where is the fun in that?” she wiggled her eyebrows at Kara, there was something in Kara though, her shoulders tensed up but Lena shrugged it off thinking she was seeing things.

“Can you just please help me get ready?” she asked, Lena nodded her head.

Lena began to sort through all the dresses Kara had until she found the right one, it was a short backless blue dress, Lena smirked and Looked to Kara as she held it up “No this should get Diana revving” Lena said.

“Are you trying to get me laid on my first date?” Kara asked, shaking her head at her best friend “I’m telling you that there will be no sex, I’m done with one-night stands” Kara said, her voice firm but she was more tense.

Lena tossed the dress onto the bed softly and winked “You have fun tonight Kara, I’ll stay here so I can hear all about this date” she said.

Kara went into the bathroom and got washed and changed ready for her big date tonight, Lena was sitting in the main room when the door opened and Kara stepped back in to the room, Lena’s mouth dropped open and her eyes widened.

Smirking at her best friend Kara folded her arms as she stood there in her backless blue dress and her hair curled down to her shoulders “I take it you like” she said.

Lena gulped “You are kidding me, if Diana does not get turned on by seeing you in that dress then I might as well pin you to the bed and have my way with you” she wiggled her eyebrows at her best friend.

Kara giggled in response and she headed out to meet her date, Lena stayed in the apartment lying in wait for Kara’s return, she was reading a book before putting one of Kara’s dvds on.

“Chick flicks, Kara seriously needs to get laid” Lena commented, most of the dvds that Lena commented on being chick flicks came after Alex had broken her heart, the thought of Alex made Lena darken in rage as the memories of her best friends broken body lying in the hospital having just smashed her car up… Kara was so out of control back then.

Lena felt the urge to kick Alex’s ass for coming back now, she had no idea that Alex was punishing herself by drinking herself till she passed out.

Lena’s thoughts of revenge though were interrupted when Diana burst through the door with an unconscious Kara in her arms “What happened?” Lena asked.

Diana looked down guiltily and didn’t answer Lena’s question, Lena glared hard making the other woman shrink away before sighing heavily.

“Kara was looking nervous…” Diana froze but Lena did not need the full sentence, she knew what Diana had done “You convinced her to drink?” she asked, anger gripping away at her.

“I thought it would help loosen her up, she was just so… tense” Diana said, and she shakily wiped her eyes “I thought one drink would not do much harm to her but one drink became another, then another, then another and she wouldn’t stop” Diana finished explaining “God forgive me… I did not mean for this to happen” she whimpered.

“Diana, you better get out” Lena said and Diana lowered her head and walked to the door but not before looking to Lena “Please tell her how sorry I am” she said.

Lena nodded her head “I will” she replied before watching as Diana left.

Kara was still unconscious and Lena looked to her with guilt in her eyes.

She knew why Kara was so tense, it was not because of Alex or because of Diana… it was because of her, she saw it when she was teasing Kara earlier about the date, she made Kara tense… she was the reason why Kara felt back in to the bottle

“What have I done?” she whispered as she put Kara to bed before climbing into the other side of the bed and wrapped Kara in her arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :)


	9. Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara wakes a following day, Alex gets a shocking surprise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the latest chapter, I hope you enjoy it.

Kara woke up later that morning with a splitting headache, the first thing she felt was Lena in bed with her, her arms tight around her body, Kara smiled but she was also worried that she and Lena had sex after Diana dropped her off, she then realised that she was still in her dress.

Last night came flooding back to her as she lay there in bed with Lena.

_ Flashback: _

_ Lena’s teasing had made Kara tense, it had been a while since she had gone on a proper date with somebody, after Alex left her for Maggie on the day she had planned to propose to Alex, Kara never did dates after that, instead she fell into bed with the first woman who showed her interest. _

_ Worry filled her every thought, was she good enough for Diana? _

_ She began to question herself constantly, Lena’s teasing and the memories of Alex leaving her was making her heart pound in her chest. _

_ Diana picked up on Kara being tense so she suggested that she have a small drink to help ease her but Kara was nervous, she wanted to stick to soda but Diana just wanted Kara to loosen up and have a good time and eventually Kara agreed to have a drink to help ease her mind. _

_ One drink turned to another, then another, then another and Kara could not stop, Diana tried to stop her but Kara simply shrugged her off, she continued to drink until she passed out. _

_ Flashback end: _

Kara had no idea how she ended up back in her apartment with Lena but assumed that Diana brought her home to Lena, she was grateful for that but she just hoped she did not destroy her friendship or promising relationship with Diana.

She got out of bed and headed into the bathroom, she heard Lena head into the kitchen not long after she closed the bathroom door, she hoped that she did not hurt Lena at all.

Walking out of the bathroom slowly, Kara walked into the kitchen and found Lena making them both coffee.

“Hey Lena” Kara whispered.

Lena smiled as she turned to Kara “Hey, you ok?” she asked.

“Apart from a raging hangover, I am fine” Kara replied before looking to Lena worried and ashamed “Did I say or do anything to you last night?” she asked.

Lena smiled and shook her head “Diana brought you home, you were unconscious” Lena answered.

Kara closed her eyes “Lena I am so sorry” she whispered.

Lena turned to look at Kara and smiled, shaking her head softly she pulled Kara tight against her body “Kara, it wasn’t your fault… it was me, Diana told me you were tense and nervous… I know it was because of what I was saying” Lena said, the guilt weighing heavily on her.

Kara squeezed Lena tight to her body “It was not your fault Lena, I should not have gone on this date… it was too soon” she whispered.

Lena sat down “Or maybe it was just the date you needed, Kara you have spent ages drowning yourself in booze since Alex left, since the accident” Kara closed her eyes and shuddered at the memory of the crash.

“I was just so angry back then, I tried to drink the pain away but it just got worse, so I got behind the wheel and smashed up my car” Kara whispered as she took a sip of her coffee.

“Kara maybe you should speak to Diana” Lena suggested, Kara nodded her head in response “I agree” she replied.

Mean whilst:

Alex had woken up in her apartment, empty bottles of whiskey all over the place and she had a raging hangover, she got to her feet shaking and she made her way over to the kitchen and got herself some aspirin and some water before downing it.

She turned around and looked at her apartment with a heavy groan, she felt weird though… everything around her seemed off but she chalked it down to the heavy amounts of whiskey she had consumed last night.

Heading into the bathroom slowly, she went to the sink and splashed water on her face, grabbing a towel from the side she dried herself off and closed her eyes, her head still throbbing from the hangover but she was feeling a bit better.

Opening her eyes she found the mirror in front of her was steamed up, she looked around confused, the room was cold.

Wiping the mirror softly she gasped when she saw it, words on the mirror ‘Wake up!’ it read, and she shook her head “I’m losing it” she whispered to herself and she turned away and there was a message on the wall of the bathroom ‘Alex… please come back to me!!!’ it read.

Alex turned to the door but found it gone and in its place, was the final message ‘I love you Alex… Wake up!!!’ Alex looked at it and ran her hands over the words “Kara” she whispered, she heard a loud whirring noises also the sound of a machine flatlining, voices echoed above her.

“She’s crashing” voices she did not recognise echoed above her.

“Alex!!!” Kara’s voice screamed, Alex dropped to her knees and sobbed heavily as she pressed her palms over her ears desperately trying to find a way to silence the noises overlapping.

“Stop it!” she cried out as she as she tried to block out the noises “I’m going mad” she whimpered and soon the noises faded away, the door was back where it was.

Alex got to her feet and she stepped out into the hall “I need to lay off the booze” she whispered to herself, her attention though was cut off by the sound of somebody moving about in the living room.

“Hello” Alex called “Mom” she moved closer towards the living room, peaking around the corner she spotted a figure standing by the window, the figure was silhouetted against the sunlight and she could not identify who it was.

“How did you get in my apartment?” Alex snarled.

The figure turned around to face her and she watched as the figure stepped away from the window and further into the room, she gasped in shock at the sight before her and shook her head “No” she whispered

“Hello Alex” the figure said as he stood before her.

“Dad” Alex whispered in shock.

“You’re dreaming Alex” Jeremiah said as he smiled “It’s time to wake up” he said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :)


	10. Ten

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth is revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the latest chapter, I hope you enjoy.

Alex stood there in her living room confused by what was happening to her, standing in front of her was her father, who had died years ago so how was he standing in front of her now.

“No… I’m losing it again” she whispered as she shook her head and moved back.

“No Alex, you are not… you’re just dreaming” Jeremiah replied.

“What is going on?” she asked with a snarl “Come to haunt me for the pain I caused Kara?” she finished, feeling the guilt and self-hatred building inside her.

“Alex… this place isn’t real” Jeremiah said, Alex looked confused.

“What are you talking about?” she asked, confusion clear on her face.

Jeremiah took up his place on the couch “Alex, Kara was never in a car crash… it was you” he said, the confusion never left Alex’s face and Jeremiah continued to explain “Alex, after my funeral you began pulling away from Kara, on your way home from partying, your car spun out and rolled down a hill, you’re in a coma” Jeremiah explained, and Alex shook her head as the memory came back to her.

The apartment morphed away from sight and in its place was a long road, Alex and Jeremiah stood there by the road and watched as Alex’s car came around the corner at high speed, music blaring from the radio and Alex watched as the front tire blew and the car went into a spin before hitting the barrier and smashed through it where it went down the hill.

Everything morphed back into her own apartment.

“So everything I saw… was not real?” she whispered in pure happiness.

“Not yet” Jeremiah replied, Alex looked to him “What?” she whispered, Jeremiah explained some more “Everything you had seen was the future Alex, I wanted to show you what would happen if you continued down this path” Jeremiah said.

“So, if I continue to pull away, I break Kara’s heart?” she asked.

Jeremiah nodded “I’m sorry Alex, I did not want to show you this but I needed to show you the error of your ways, if you keep on like this… you will break her heart, she will fall into drinking and violence and then she will end up marrying Diana” those words drove a knife into her heart and twisted it.

“Maybe Diana would be good enough for her” Alex whispered.

Jeremiah shook his head “Alex, do you love Kara?” he asked her firmly.

Alex looked to him and she nodded her head “Of course I do… I love her with everything I am worth, I will never stop loving her” Alex admitted.

Jeremiah smiled “I know, so grow up Alex… this madness has to stop” he said firmly.

Alex nodded her head but sadness filled her and she looked to him “Dad… I am sorry you died because of me” she thought back to how he died, the memory shattered her heart.

“Alex, don’t feel guilty… it’s a father’s job to protect their daughter, I would gladly give my life for yours again” Jeremiah said as he placed his hands on her shoulders, “Alex, let go of the guilt, it wasn’t your fault” he said.

Alex nodded her head and hugged him tight “I miss you so much” she sobbed.

Jeremiah hugged her back “I will always be with you Alex” he whispered before pulling back “Now, wake up” he said.

She shook her head and wiped her eyes “I don’t know how” she whispered.

He smiled and looked behind Alex “there, just walk through that door and you will wake up” he stated.

She nodded “5 years in a coma… Kara will be pissed” Alex smiled fondly, she learnt her lesson and now it was time to make things right”

“Oh, it’s only been 5 years here inside your head… in the real world it’s been 3 months after the crash” Jeremiah said but smiled “And I am sure we both know that Kara would wait forever for you” he finished, she smiled more knowing Kara would.

She stepped forward towards the metal door and Jeremiah called to her “Alex” he called, she turned to him, he smiled “I know I’ve never said this… but I am so proud of you” he said.

“Goodbye dad” she whispered with a tearful smile, she hated goodbyes but saying it now… she felt a heavy weight lifted off her and she turned back towards the metal door and opened it, revealing a bright light and it enveloped her.

Before everything went dark again, the sound of a machine beating to her heart is what drew her attention first, then the feeling of a soft hand in her own hand and finally… what was this thing down her throat?

She woke with a choked gasp as she tried to breath but instead she just choked more, Kara woke up with a fright and she smiled bright before rushing to the door and shouted “Help!!! I need help in here!!!” she shouted before grabbing Alex’s hand tight “Baby, focus on me, don’t worry” Kara gave her hand a squeeze as Alex nodded her head and followed Kara’s instructions before the doctors came in and removed the tube from Alex’s mouth causing Alex to cough violently.

Kara was standing with Eliza as the doctors worked on Alex before finally they finished up and Alex sat there in the bed with Eliza, Kara, Lucy and Lena standing there in front of her, Lena was not looking happy with Alex but Alex could not blame her one bit, the guilt and anger over Jeremiah’s death had caused Alex to pull away from Kara.

Her eyes fixed on Kara and it looked like she hardly slept, Alex studied Kara some more before reaching out to Kara, Kara walked closer and took Alex’s hands into her own.

“Forgive me, for being a bitch” Alex whispered though her voice was rough though.

Kara giggled in response and nodded though she was close to tears, Alex moved over and pulled Kara into the bed before motioning to everyone with her other hand to clear out of the room.

This moment was hers and Kara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Hope you like the twist, thanks for reading.


	11. Eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex asks a question and she returns home with Kara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok just 1 more chapter to go, I would like to thank you all for your support and all of your comments.

Alex could not believe this whole time she had been in a coma, she remembered the night she landed in a coma clear as day, it was engraved on her brain and it was painful especially the tears in Kara’s eyes as she pleaded to Alex to open-up to her.

The guilt though of Jeremiahs death had weighed heavily on Alex, it was suffocating her to the point where she refused to look at Kara, she blamed herself for her father’s death and it led to her spiralling into the party girl and drinking heavily, she should never had gotten in the car whilst drunk and she was mentally face-palming herself for her own stupidity.

She was now awake, she had learnt a valuable lesson from the coma dream that her father showed her, she did not want to lose Kara and she needed help, she needed to stop her drinking.

Kara had gone home to get washed and changed, Alex was waiting patiently when Eliza came in, her eyes full of fury and Alex looked to her hands instead of looking to her mother, already knowing what her mother was going to say.

“Care to explain yourself Alexandra?” Eliza asked, folding her arms as she glared at Alex.

Alex cringed, she hated it when her mother said her full first name, she only did that when she was pissed at Alex and rightly so, no long after burying her husband, her own daughter ends up in a coma after a car crash caused by her by her drunk driving.

Alex looked to her mother ashamed “I’m sorry mom” she whispered.

“Don’t apologise to me, apologise to Kara… that poor girl never left your side, I had to physically drag her back to the apartment that you both share just so she could eat and get changed then she’d come back and sleep in that chair” Eliza said as she pointed to the chair next to Alex’s bed.

Alex closed her eyes, she knew her mother was correct, she owed Kara more than just an apology, she owed Kara an explanation but how could she but how could she possibly tell Kara that she felt responsible for Jeremiahs death.

The truth was always the best approach, she learnt that from the coma… she could not let Kara go this time, no more pulling away, no more being afraid… one way or another Alex was going to get help and she would be the woman Kara deserved… Kara deserved the world and Alex was going to make sure she got it.

Kara returned as Eliza walked out of the room, Kara looked to Alex and smiled softly “Your mother spoke to you I see” Kara said.

Alex nodded her head “If you can call it talking but she is right… Kara, I’m ready to talk now” she replied.

Kara sighed as she sat down on the edge of the bed “Alex, since Jeremiah died… I’ve been feeling as though you’ve been pulling away from me” Kara whispered.

Alex’s heart clenched at how broken Kara sounded “I know Kara, I am sorry for making you feel like that” Alex took Kara’s hands into her own “Kara, when my father did… I felt responsible for it, he died saving my life” Alex said.

Kara nodded her head in response “I know Alex, but it wasn’t your fault” Kara gave Alex’s hand a squeeze.

Alex nodded “I know, it took me landing myself in a coma to figure it out but Kara… one thing I have known for years is that I am head over heels in love with you” Alex whispered as she took a deep gulp of hair, her heart pounding in her chest “I want to share my life with you, so… Kara, will you marry me?” Alex asked.

Kara’s grin went bright, she nodded her head “Yes, yes I will marry you” she whispered, tears in her eyes.

Alex wrapped her arms tight around Kara and grinned, she had learnt a valuable lesson now and nothing was going to change what she had learnt, she would be the woman Kara deserved or die trying.

Alex was released from the hospital a few days later, Kara was happy that her fiancée had come home to her, Alex’s foot was in plaster and she was confined to her home and a wheelchair much to her disappointment, it would have been better had Kara was home with her then at least she and Kara could spend time together.

She spent months in a coma induced dream world where Kara hated her, that memory made her upset but now here she was, in the real world engaged to Kara.

Kara was in her office at work when her cell rang out, Kara smiled fondly and shook her head “Alex, I told you I am in work and can’t cook your food right now” Kara said.

“What makes you think I was going to ask?” Alex asked indignantly.

Kara smirked “Because you sent me 3 texts, left 4 voicemails and sent me a Snapchat pick of your belly with the words _‘Feed me Kara, feed me!’_ Kara replied in mock dramatics.

“Oh so you got the hidden message, I thought I wasn’t obvious enough” Alex replied as she scratched her head before whining “Well I’m hungry and your promised to be home an hour ago” she whined.

“I know babe, Snapper has me working late in the office though” Kara replied with a growl making Alex shiver, fuck she loved it when Kara growled.

“Kara, I swear I’m going to go ‘rear window’ if I keep spying on the neighbours with my binoculars” Alex said.

Kara laughed “Oh I love you Alex” she said as she laughed.

“Love you too now get some food and get home, I am hungry and I want you in bed with me” Alex replied.

“Alex, you can’t eat and have sex at the same time” Kara said.

Alex raised her eyebrows and smirked “Oh you want to bet on that” she said seductively.

Kara shivered “Fuck it, be right there” Kara was gone but before she hung up Alex heard the chair falling over as Kara dived off it and out the door, in a hurry to get home.

Alex laughed “To the bedroom” she cried dramatically as if commanding her imaginary soldiers to charge into battle before wheeling herself into the bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :) you are all amazing.


	12. Twelve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the final chapter, I hope you enjoy it.

Alex often shuddered at the memories of the coma world Kara hating her so much after breaking her heart, not that Alex could blame her but that was why she considered herself lucky that it was just a dream.

The wedding was in full planning stage and Kara used her vacation time to plan the wedding with Alex, get married and go on her honeymoon, much to Snappers rage, he was considering firing Kara when she came back but Cat Grant returned and fired him first when she found out what he was going to do.

Alex and Kara continued their long journey together as a married couple, of course Alex did go to counselling and AA meetings about her drinking and the grief over her father’s death, but unlike in the dream world she found herself in when she was in a coma, she spoke to Kara instead of running off to night clubs and drinking herself stupid.

Most of the time now she stuck to sodas but that does not mean to say that there were not times where she fell off the wagon because she did, she fell off the wagon hard but what made her stop though was one incident that happened, she never meant for it to happen but it was a wake-up call for her to stop.

Kara returned home the one night and found Alex drinking heavily, she was downing a bottle of beer and it was one of many bottles she had drunk.

Kara tried to take the bottle off Alex, but Alex flew into a rage, grabbing Kara by the wrist tight and squeezed until she bruised, Kara pleaded with Alex to stop but Alex was not listening until she realized what she was doing.

She looked to Kara’s wrist and there was an angry bruise starting to form slowly, Alex went to take Kara’s hand gently but Kara jerked away, Alex lowered her head as she realized what she had done and she went into the spare bedroom and locked herself inside.

The next morning Alex was afraid Kara would leave her, she never meant to hurt Kara but she had drank so much that she lost her temper, she kept herself locked in the spare bedroom until Kara entered the room.

Alex and Kara spoke all day and night until Alex had finished sobbing though the guilt was still there, but it was not plain as day for her, she had a genuine problem and it was time to deal with it before she hurts Kara again.

Alex did, she kept her promise and went to AA meetings and counselling and Kara went with her for emotional support, she was not going to let her wife go through this alone.

Finally Alex had new reason to keep herself in check, Kara and her went to the clinic when they wanted to start a family, Alex had eggs take out of her and put inside Kara, a few months later Kara discovered that the procedure worked and she was pregnant with Alex’s daughter.

Alex was excited to be a mother, her alcohol problem was now under control and she had been sober for a while, she was no longer seeing the councillor to confront her guilt over Jeremiah’s death but instead she had let it go, she understood now that it wasn’t her fault.

9 months since the procedure and Kara finally gave birth to their 1st daughter, Jennifer Danvers… Alex watched as Kara held her daughter in her arms and she smiled, she was the luckiest woman on the planet and Kara was more than she deserved but she was never going to let go of the woman she loved or her family.

5 years had passed by and Alex and Kara were happy, they had their 5-year-old daughter but then Kara got pregnant again after deciding to have more kids so they went back to the clinic, Kara and Alex argued about who would be the one to carry the child this time but Kara soon one the fight, she was the one to carry the new child.

Though they both had a shock when Kara did get pregnant, they discovered Kara was carrying twins.

Alex was ecstatic and so was Kara, their family was growing and Alex was no longer drinking, everything was perfect.

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading and thank you for the support.

**Author's Note:**

> Oh dear, Alex has returned with Maggie... what will Kara's reaction be when she wakes up: Punch or scream?


End file.
